Two years ago tonight, was the last night I got to tuck my sweet baby into bed. Not a day goes by that I don't think about you Maxxton. I feel like everyone forgets that I deal with this on a daily basis. It's hard to fake a smile or laugh when most the time I feel like crying and hiding from reality. I can't even communicate it to my own husband how I feel. It wouldn't matter anyways, he wouldn't notice the pain or hurt in my heart. I miss you Maxxton. You are and always will be my baby. Maxxton Ryker Lynn Madill 06/10/10-07/25/10

Raising Money

Raising money is a lot harder than I anticipated. My plan was to have the foundation up and running smoothly by this time. But I am into this all out of pocket with no help so far and a long list of people wanting journals. I want to help people so bad but I can't hurt my family financially by doing so.

I am stuck on what to do? Do I move forward and keep pushing or throw in the towel and call it a loss?

I need some kind of reassurance I guess?

Positive Journeys

So much has happened in my life since the loss of my baby Maxxton. I am working on a positive journey for the future and being able to help others thru our losses together.

I started the Maxxton Foundation AKA "I'm With You". With this I am providing custom journals to parents of an angel. In order to keep this going, I have different items I am selling to raise the money. Some hand made, some made in bulk.

I just want to feel comfort and I have found that in helping others feel comfort. <3

like my Facebook page: "I'm With You" or check out the WebStore

Thank you everyone for your continued support!

<3

Racheal

Website

I miss you Maxxton

I love you Maxxton. I wish I could hold you and hear your cute voice!

Why My Mommy Lies

Ask My Mom How She Is 
 My Mom, she tells a lot of lies  
She never did before  
But from now until she dies  
She'll tell a whole lot more  
Ask My mom how she is  
And because she cant explain  
She will tell a little lie  
Because she cant describe the pain 
  Ask My Mom how she is  
She'll say 'I'm Alright'  
If that's the truth then tell me  
Why does she cry each night?  
Ask My Mom how she is 
  She seems to cope so well  
She didnt have a choice you see  
Nor the strength to yell 
  Ask My Mom how she is  
'I'm fine. I'm well, I'm coping'  
For God's sake Mom, just tell the truth  
Just say your heart is broken  
She'll love me all her life  
I loved her all mine  
But if you ask her how she is  
She'll lie and say she's fine 
  I am here in Heaven  
I cannot hug from here  
If she lies to you DON't listen  
Hug her and hold her near  
On the day we meet again 
We'll smile and I'll be bold I'll say, ' You're lucky to get in here Mom,  
With all the lies you told!'

Distance

"The distance between joy and pain can be measured by one heartbeat" ~Unknown~

 

I miss you so much Maxx!

Thank you!! Shauna & Lindsay

Lindsay made this beautiful cloud for Maxxton's bday! 

Shauna sent me this for Maxx :-)